I'm going to take all of their toys and burn them in a big beautiful bonfire

They wouldn't miss them. They couldn't care less. I know, I know this is something moms talk about ALL the time but honestly this is getting ridiculous. Why have I given up my living for their toys? It looks like I live in a daycare center with all the crap they have strewn about, most of which gets chewed on and then dropped onto the floor.
Today I went to BJ's. Do they have BJ's in other states? I don't know, but it's a wholesale place like CostCo etc. Anywho, so I bring home a huge package of toilet paper with like, 40 rolls in it and an equally enormous package of paper towels and a box of diapers that should last Zoey until she's 13. So Lindsey drags the pack of papertowels into the living room and Zoey decides to follow suite, so she drags the pack of toilet paper into the living room. They then proceed to climb up on said packages and "slide" down the other side saying "wheeee" each time. They must have repeated this about 1 million times. Then Lindsey took the empty box that the diapers came in and filled it up with her legos, sealed it with tape and proceeded to drag it around to different locations of the house. Why? I don't know.
Tonight, while they sleep, all of their "real" toys will be burning in the backyard and I'll be roasting marshmallows.