My mom came over today to watch the kids for me while I napped ( it was a fabulous nap I might add). The girls were all wound up for some reason. They were running around like a couple of hooligans playing the "who can yell the loudest game." My mom had ZERO control of them. As she was trying to get them ready to go outside Zoey took her shoes and socks off THREE times within about 5 minutes and my mom had to keep putting them back on meanwhile Lindsey was raising pure hell and not cooperating in the least bit, not being really fresh, just hyper. Lindsey is the ring leader and she can really get Zoey acting crazy. It was quite amusing to watch my mom get her ass kicked by a three year old and an 18 month old. Buahahahaha!

My brother G. called my parents yesterday to let them know he had arrived in S. Korea safely. He said his apartment is nicer than the one he had here (he had been expecting a studio but it's a regular sized one bedroom, living room, kitchen) and on the same block as his apartment is a Dunkin Donuts, McDonalds, and an Outback. Oooh, sounds so exotic doesn't it?

So long big brother.....

My brother left this morning for an 18 hour flight to South Korea. He will be there for a year, no breaks to come home and visit. He was in a rut in his life and felt he needed a complete change, something new and challenging so he's off to teach English to elementary school kids in South Korea. He's my only sibling and we don't have any cousins (or aunts or uncles or grandparents for that matter) so it sucks he'll be gone for so long. Family functions around these parts are very quiet as it is so his presence will be greatly missed.
I've reminded myself that many families, including pregnant wives, have to say good bye to their loved ones for longer periods of time while they go off to war torn places like Iraq where their lives are in danger everyday. So really, teaching at a school in South Korea for a year isn't such a big deal. It will be really weird to not see him for a whole year though. It sucks that my kiddos will go so long without him. Lindsey will remember him but Zoey certainly won't and the newest baby won't even meet him until she's 7 months old. Anywho, I'm sure he'll be fine and grow from the experience, just as long as those crazy North Koreans don't pull any stunts. I know, I know calling ALL North Koreans crazy is a prejudice thing to say but seriously, that country is FUCKED UP! If you don't know anything about North Korea there is this great documentary on PBS about it and I'm telling you that is the most INSANE little universe those poor North Koreans are living in. Yikes.

Letting out a BIG sigh of relief

All seems to be well. We had our Level II u/s yesterday and the same OB that saw me in the ER was able to come do my u/s and talk with me which was great. I hate it when you go to the hospital and you see five different doctors and you have to retell your story over and over again. So he didn't see any signs of danger on the u/s, the placenta was a little low but it wasn't separated from the uterus so we don't really know what happened. He thinks maybe because the very tip of my placenta is near my cervix that may have been the cause of the bleeding. Since I'm only 16 weeks he thinks the placenta will move up further out of the way.
The u/s tech blurted out, completely unprompted, that she thinks it's a girl but it's still too early to be sure. Hubby is pissed that she told us with out asking if we wanted to know. Part of me wanted to be surprised but part of me is glad I know who's in there.
THREE GIRLS! Can you imagine what it's going to be like around her in 12 years!!!!!!!!! Holy Christ!!!!!!!!!!!

One more thing. I'm on "pelvic rest" until my next appointment! Hubby is going to be such a crab. Looks like I'm going to have to "perform" some other tasks to relieve his DSB. In case you don't know what DSB is, it's Dreaded Sperm Build Up. Yup, this is what my charming 36 year old husband tells me he's suffering from when he's a grouch and we haven't had sex in a few days. Charming, isn't it....

Hubby and I are going to our U/S in about an hour and then I have a follow up with the OB after to talk about the results. Unfortunately my regular OB is on vacation so I'll be seeing her colleague( I have no idea how to spell that word). Right now I'm feeling pretty confident that all will be okay.
I hadn't planned on finding out the baby's sex with this pregnancy at our BIG u/s in May but now I'm thinking if there is the possibility of loosing this baby then I want to know if it's a boy or a girl, a son or a daughter. So if we can find out today, maybe we will. It will be hard to get excited about it but I think we will want to know if something goes wrong.

I'm terrified that I'm losing this baby. I can't even believe this is happening to me. Losing a baby in the second trimester is something that happens to other people, not me.

Haven't been blogging much for the past several days because we've been trying to keep busy. We have carpenters working in our basement framing it out and replacing the staircase so we can finally build ourselves a playroom. So needless to say it's LOUD when they're hear so Zoey can't nap so we've been spending our days out of the house. We can't even stay and play in the backyard because the men are going in and out through the basement door that is inside our pool area so they have the gate to the pool area constantly open. Obviously not safe for the kids to be playing near that. So we've kept busy by going to MIL's house for the day and going to the library and out to lunch and playgrounds and indoor playspaces etc. You get the picture. Zoey has been taking the majority of her naps in the car. To keep Lindsey happy while we're trapped in the car for an hour or two while little sister sleeps I let her watch a DVD and sometimes get her an ice cream from the new ice cream stand down the street. She' s a very good sport about the whole thing, especially when she gets ice cream.

The girls were playing in the upstairs hallway last night as I was about 10 feet away in our home office checking my email. I wasn't really paying attention to what they were doing. They had decided to take all of their blankets, pillows, books and random toys out of their rooms and display them in the hallway. They were having fun and it's always so damn cute when they play together but of course I was the one that did the majority of the clean up.

Some pics from the past few days.
Lindsey dressed as a princess, she spends most of her days dressed in this manner, I'm not kidding.
The Easter Bunny paid us a visit for the first time this year.
They had a lot of fun hunting for eggs.

Action shot of Z finding an egg.

A couple of mad scientists in their laboratory. Lindsey said they were baking cherry pies.

I'm starting to wonder if something is actually wrong with me. I'm beginning to think that I may be depressed. I don't mean depressed like, oh poor me my life is horrible and I don't want to go on; I mean I'm in a major funk. I have no energy. At first I thought this was just pregnancy fatigue, but it's something else. I have no desire or no energy to do the things I usually do. I haven't brought the kids to the playground or museum or the indoor playspace we usually go to in months. These are things we usually do on a weekly basis. I didn't re-join my usual playgroup this spring nor did I sign the girls up for another session of Gymboree, even though they love going there. I have snapped at Lindsey on more than one occasion which has then caused me to burst into tears because I felt so terrible. The house is an absolute disaster. I mean it's really gross and I have no motivation to clean it, which isn't like me. I have little interest in playing with the kids. Many days when DH is home I tell him I don't feel well and escape to my bed and pull the covers over my head and don't come out for a few hours. I could probably sleep for 15 hours a day. Poor DH is being seriously neglected in the love making department because at night all I want to do is lay in bed and not talk to anyone and watch tv and go to sleep. It's taken me a while to recognize this but I think there is something wrong here. I don't like myself right now because I'm not behaving like myself. I'm not writing this so that people can feel sorry for me I just needed to get it all down, get it out. I have an appt with my OB this week and I plan to talk to her about this but I'm afraid I'm either going to wimp out or she won't take me serious enough. I just hate being a lump. I want to be fun again. Where did I go?

I have such a horrible cold that I'm coughing so much I gag and then I sometimes throw up because I gag so much and it's nothing but yellow mucus coming out of me. How gross am I? I bet you all wanted to hear about that.
I woke Zoey up with my coughing this morning at 4:45 am and she wouldn't go back to sleep so we were up before the sun today. Wonderful.

I've been a blog slacker this week because my life is boring, nothing to report. I have a horrible head cold, I sound like such a dork when I talk with this nasal voice.
I had a great playdate today over at Lindsey's friend's house. The mom and I have really hit it off. She also has a baby a day younger than Zoey so they "play" together too which is cute.
I'm starting to feel so much better m/s wise and energy wise. I was honestly starting to wonder whether or not something was wrong with me. I thought I might be depressed or something, since I didn't want to play with the kids, didn't want to get off the couch and basically just spent my days wishing I could go back to bed and hide under the covers. Thankfully I have started feeling more energized and have been my usual playful self with the kids for the past two days. I was really starting to freak myself out a little. I hope it was all just first trimester hormones.
Also totally unrelated, there is this total bitch on my DIO board. I hardly ever post there but every time she posts something I have to read it because she is so completely offensive and judgmental it actually makes me laugh. Why is it that some people feel the need to share their opinions on EVERYTHING in the most argumentative manner? And why does she think that anyone cares about what she has to say anyway? Some people are just so self centered and have NO people skills it amazes me and amuses me at that same time. Real nasty bitchy people crack me up.

Don't you hate it when you have a craving for something really specific. So you go out and get it and when you get home to eat it you are so excited and it tastes like crap!? It's soooo disappointing.
I really really wanted Chinese food. I dragged the kids with me to pick up some take out. Could barely get home without eating it right out of the box while driving. Sat down to feast and it tasted like road kill. I know Chinese food really is hit or miss, and it may very well have been road kill that they served me. Sooo disappointed. At least tomorrows trash day so it won't sit in the trash stinking up the neighborhood for a week. Hey, look at that, I found the bright side.

Well so far this day light savings thing is working in my favor. Z slept until 6:30 today instead of her usual 5:30. Let's hope she makes a habit of this.

I have to go to this stupid retirement party for FIL tonight. I know that sounds thoughtless of me but let me explain. It's not a retirement party thrown by his family and close friends it's thrown by the Firefighters Union so it's ALL the old retired farts, I mean firefighters and of course all the current firefighters are invited but I doubt they'll all go and then miscellaneous family members. It's over an hour from our house and Hubby is in charge of running it so we have to go early and stay LATE. I'm tired just thinking about it. As it is I already go to bed these days before 9 and I was up at 5 am today so I'm in for a rough night.
We are thinking of telling the hubby's parents our big news tonight. I've past the 12 week mark so I guess it's time to spill the beans. Apparently MIL told FIL that she suspected over the past month that I may be pregnant because when ever she sees me I look really tired. (She comes over twice a week to watch the kids and usually I leave as soon as she gets here but lately I've just been going upstairs and taking a nap. I knew she must be getting suspicious). But she told FIL that she took a good hard look at me on Thursday and concluded that I am not pregnant. Buahahahaha. FIL relayed this conversation to hubby and hubby claims he played it cool and assured him I wasn't pregnant. I suspect he didn't actually play it all that "cool", but who knows.